Astrologer Nia Fyler recently spoke out about the abuse she suffered at the hands of renowned astrologer, Alan Oken, who passed away earlier this month.
Thirteen years ago, Nia – who at the time identified as male and was known as Boaz – was a young budding astrologer, honoured to be asked to give Alan Oken a tour of Jerusalem during his visit there to speak at an astrology conference.
At the end of the tour, Oken invited Boaz up to his apartment to give him brochures about his astrology school, offering Boaz a scholarship. Oken then jumped on Boaz, who froze, and Oken engaged with him sexually.
Oken left Israel immediately afterwards and never had contact with Boaz again, until Boaz confronted Oken sometime later and was completely dismissed and verbally abused by him.
She now says “I remember how bewildered and astonished I was that a spiritual teacher came onto me. I wasn’t ready for that. And I couldn’t stop it. Or I didn’t know how to.”
Upon Alan Oken’s recent death, the outpourings of love for Oken and his work prompted Nia to share her story, noting the importance of acknowledging ‘a man in his full; the full spectrum of that person, and if there is a shadow, to not ignore it’.
You can watch Nia share story at the beginning of the video above.
Nia first shared her story two years ago (here), during the exposing of misconduct by another very well-known astrologer, whom I used to work for. I had left that job two years previously, due to finding out about this man’s abuse of the student-teacher relationship.
There is abuse of power everywhere, and no less has it been absent in the field of astrology.
And when you are a spiritual teacher, claiming to hold ‘healing’ space for others, your abuse of power can inflict harm on a whole other level.When you quite literally promise to hold a Soul in the palm of your hands, on the basis of the many spiritual virtues that you profess and advocate for – the level of damage, the amount of trauma and re-traumatisation that you have the power to cause, is truly beyond measure.
And I’ve seen it happen. To merely know about, be close to and witness the effects of this abuse has broken me, so I can only imagine what it is to actually be victim to it.
It’s this kind of gross misconduct that can cause and has caused people to become disillusioned with and abandon a field such as astrology altogether.
I even considered distancing myself entirely, if it wasn’t for the few people I knew in the community who stood for and practiced a far greater ethical standard. To them I will be eternally grateful. You know who you are. Aside from my unrelenting love for this practice, in so many ways you are why I am still here. And you are embodying the future of astrology, and of trauma-informed work everywhere.
What is key is accountability.
We will all make mistakes, and I believe there is nearly always space and possibility for healing – but without acknowledgement, remorse, accountability, there is often nowhere to go.
Aside from the acts themselves, it is the lack of accountability that has personally rendered me enraged, defeated and ultimately silent in the past, and I know it has so many others. And then the cycle of trauma often only worsens and continues on.
This is why we must stand for a far greater standard of ethics in the field of astrology, and bring these stories to the fore wherever we can. (And when attempts at accountability and restoration are made privately, and fail, there is often no choice but to bring them into the public sphere.)
There must be a priority to prevent future harm, as well as to support the healing of those who have already been affected.
With astrology being an as-yet unregulated field, these cases of misconduct have too often been lost in the blurred lines. These issues can be hard to even begin to acknowledge and define, let alone talk about. Yet we must endeavour to bring them into the light, and support each other in the process.
The astrologer-client and student-teacher dynamic can be so defining. It can make or break. Down to the soul-level. And it therefore must be treated with the highest responsibility.
To Nia, and to everyone who has been subject to abuse and manipulation – sexual and otherwise – by a spiritual teacher, or even just plain hurt by a lack of trauma-informed behaviour, I stand with you. You are not alone. And we have the likes of Nia to thank for this affirmation. And to bring us together in the name of truth and – hopefully – transformation.
Thank you, Nia, for your beyond-words bravery. And to everyone who has spoken out since this conversation began in the astrology community two years ago.
It is long overdue, and may the conversation continue.
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Remember you can find Nia’s sharing of her story via these links here and here.
